The Great Seed Hunt

2020-01-15 ◦ 2 Minute read

This is a port of an old blog article from a previous website of mine. It does not reflect how I am now, but is ported for completeness sake. Regardless, I have done my best to port it to this website as it was originally intended, which was difficult as I used to write these articles as JSON with html encoding. Yes, I used to preview and edit posts that way. This article dances a fine line toward being able-ism, going so far as to reference a slur for autistic people. Despite how confident the author seems that it would never be, the seed was found a handful of months later.

Hooray! a use for my blog system! THIS IS A PARODY.

The great Seed hunt. How perfectly in-time for Easter... if it was April. Nay, for the great seed hunt is a time where the Minecraft community, Or rather a small portion consiting of Computer nerds & children, Get together and find the Seed for this world:

Minecraft's pack.png, it is a screenshot of a small cliffed hill by a lake.

Easy enough, Right? ...Wrong. Dead Wrong. There are a few things we know, such as;

The Editing Software for the image.
Roughly when and what version it was taken from.
Not many people have tried.
Brussel Sprouts taste bad.

Useless on their own, but combined, we can gleam that... we know nothing. And so, as the great explorers try to brute-force the seed in a physically impossible way (No, you will not brute-force it with any form of computer before the universe dies!), and the 9 year olds claim it's a bedrock edition seed, i just sit there. Sit there and wonder... Why?<

So i got to thinking. If people are that invested, there must be a reason. It can't simply be that people wanna play with that map, can it? no. it must be something greater. So i turned to minecraft's target audiance. According to gadgetgirl05 on slideshare, to which i skipped past and skimmed, Minecraft's target audiance is the 14-25 range. Teenager to Young adult. Seems simple enough. So i googled these numbers, and got -11.

I went on to google Mental Health rates. and found this. 'Half of all mental illness begins by the age of 14.' Naturally, an article i only read the title for. This is irefutable proof, that all minecraft players have some form of mental condition.

With Mixed anxiety and Depression being leading common mental disorders, it's clear to see it. Minecraft Players have Depression. And it is this depression, that allows them to be very focused on one task. Almost like autism. nfact, it is autism. Because they are all 14+ and that tells me they were vaccinated. So what i'm saying, is the community of seed hunters are actually a bunch of depressed autis- hang on... Yep, that's the police at my door.

Happy hunting! -Bob